What Growing Up in Foster Care Taught Me About Leading Struggling Schools

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👋 Welcome back to Harper Haven, your weekly blueprint for building a joyful and high-performing school for students and staff… without burning yourself out. I’m glad you’re here.

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🦄 In this this issue…

💜 Why stability should be your #1 strategy

💜 How to make your people feel seen + create strong feelings of belonging

💜 How your personal story impacts your leadership style

#LetsDoThis #ForTheCulture
— Alicia Harper

Before I ever led in struggling schools, I learned how to survive them.

Struggling schools. And broken systems.

I grew up in the NYC foster care system. By the time I finished elementary school, I’d gone to five different schools, all of which were under-resourced, under-performing, and on the struggle bus.

I didn’t know the word “underserved” back then and I didn’t have the language for the educational inequity I was experiencing.

I just knew that some days the windows were broken, the paints were chipping off the walls, the water fountains didn’t work, the books were missing pages (if there were even enough books for my classmates and me 🫠 ), and my teachers were exhausted.

I knew what it looked like to walk into a school building and think, “Does anyone here believe I’m worth their best effort?”

Most importantly, I knew that Little Alicia deserved better.

When I became a Principal, I inherited a school that folks had written off — low student achievement, unhappy staff, skeptical families, and so much more.

I’m proud that we turned it around in less than 3 years.

When people ask me to share how we did it, they’re usually talking about what programs I used, or they wanna know the exact curriculum that worked, or the ins and out of the intervention model.

Those tactical things are important and I share them openly. But…

My honest answer?
I use what Little Alicia taught me.

Here’s the thing: nobody teaches you how to survive foster care. There’s no playbook, there’s no blueprint, and there’s not even a guarantee about where you’re gonna sleep within the next few years.

Whew, chile… talk about something being unsettling for your nervous system!

What I did learn was…

How to quickly read people.
How to adapt when systems don’t work.
How to stay steady when things around me felt chaotic.

And… how to plan for a future I couldn’t yet see and be optimistic for results that didn’t yet exist.

At the time, I didn’t realize those skills would eventually shape how I lead schools. But years later, when I stepped into my first turnaround role, those instincts came rushing back.

Because struggling schools have something in common with broken systems: They’re unpredictable, they’re a roller coaster of emotions, and many people inside them stop believing that change is even possible.

You’ve probably heard it before: people need to feel seen.

As someone who grew up feeling invisible because I learned quickly that I needed to shrink myself in order to survive, let me tell ya’… That ain’t a myth!

In systems that are broken, people carry a lot of invisible weight.

Students. Teachers. Families. Errbody!

In foster care, the adults who made the biggest difference were the ones who actually saw me.

Not my case file. Not my situation.

When I led a turnaround school, I realized something quickly: teachers don’t want to feel like, “Oh, here comes another initiative that ain’t gon’ work.” They’re sick of it!

But when they feel understood and invested it, they’re willing to move.

Leadership of any kind starts with listening and learning.
And actually seeing your people.

One thing I’ve learned over the years is that every leader brings something into the work that no leadership book can teach.

It might be your background. It might be your struggles. It might be your experiences with systems that worked (or, let’s be real… didn’t work).

Your experiences are what makes you… YOU.

The best turnaround leaders don’t try to copy someone else’s style. They dig deep and draw from the lessons life has already given them.

Don’t hide your story. It’s what makes you unique. And, more importantly, your team is waiting on you to tap into the lessons your story taught you to guide the way. 😄

Each week, I share tips and tricks on how to build strong schools through sustainable systems and real-life case studies that you might have missed. Take five minutes to get caught up!

Everyone’s talking about these posts so join the conversation:

💜 I spoke at two sessions at SXSW EDU in Austin, TX last week and shared the biggest theme that came out of those sessions. Check it out here.

💜 Want proof that where you start doesn’t have to be where you end up. All you need is a little faith and a consistent work along the way. Check it out here.

💜 What happens when you get a group of school leaders, Principals, Superintendents, Chief Academic Officers, and CEOs in one room? And you add small bites and drinks? A really safe space for people to speak openly about the ups and downs of this work… without judgement. It was the ultimate brand partnership! Check it out here.

Thanks for kickin’ it with me!